Thursday, January 22, 2009

Stress and food

I eat when I am stressed. Not only do I eat but I eat crap. Well not total crap but definitely more stuff than I needed.

I have a case at work that is irritating me. I feel like I have given my professional opinion as have others and it is not being listened to. I understand the desire to have your child do something other than we are suggesting but I feel for this child. I think he will be overwhelmed and it just makes me sad. I feel so stuck. When I went to talk to the assistant Principal about my feelings I immediately opened her cookie jar and ate 2 milky ways. Why? because I am anxious about the whole situation.

Then I am feeling like a horrible teacher right now. I have not been getting the planning I need to do done so I am flying by the seat of my pants. I am getting done what needs to be done but barely and not in a very good fashion. My assistants do more teaching than I do. I spend my planning on message boards and checking out the Internet.

I think some of it is a transition from just me to me and baby. She is the best little baby that I could ever hope for. She sleeps all evening since she does not sleep at daycare. This afternoon I exercised and then cooked dinner. I made mac and cheese and ate about 15 points worth. It was tasty but I think I buried my anxiety in comfort food. I then spent about 45 minutes playing on the computer. I just need to learn some time management.

The one thing that I can say is that when I dieted a few years ago when I was overwhelmed and very anxious, I got ultra organized. I think it helps me to have control over everything that I can. I am able to let go of things I do not have control over. For instance, I am cooking at home more since I made 5 weeks of meal plans. I also made corresponding shopping lists. That has helped that. I need to make a routine for the week of what I need to get done. I think this will allow me to have that one or 2 nights that I can scrapbook or cross stitch.

This has become a very long winded post. I have a lot to do over the next few days. Kids have a half day tomorrow and I can use that time to play catch up and plan. I have no kids on Monday so I can get some work done then to. I plan on putting my headphones on and ignoring everyone.

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